Guy gets even with his wife in a crazy way


One evening last week, my wife and I got into bed.


We were fooling around, the passion started to heat up, when she suddenly says: “I don’t feel like it, I just want you to hold me.”


I said, “WHAT? Then what was all that about?!?”


“You’re just not in touch enough with my emotional needs as a woman, for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.”


She saw my puzzled look and said, “Can’t you just love me for who I am and not for what I do in the bedroom?”


Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.


The very next day I decided to take the day off work to spend time with her.  We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store.


I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits.  She couldn’t decide which one to take so I told her “we’ll just buy them all”.


She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit.


We went to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings.


Let me tell you, she was so excited.  She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck.


I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn’t even know how to play tennis.  I think I threw her for a loop when I said, “That’s fine, honey.”She was almost nearing ecstatic satisfaction from all of the excitement.


Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, “I think this is all dear, let’s go to the cashier.”


I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, “No honey, I don’t feel like it.”


Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled “WHAT??!!!”


Then I said, “Really, honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You’re just not in touch enough with my financial needs as a man, for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.”


And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me I added, “Why can’t you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?”

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